struck, for once and for all, by a large machine at the Royal Canadian Mint in Winnipeg last spring.">

Goodbye penny, it was nice knowing you (but not really)


Published:

It was nice knowing you, Penny. (Image: Catherine Bulinski)

Today the plug was pulled on “Penny,” the Canadian one-cent piece, but her body will lie in repose for viewing, indefinitely, on top of dressers and in kitchen drawers country-wide. Born 1858, Penny Moneypenny (spinster) was 154 years old when she was struck, for once and for all, by a large machine at the Royal Canadian Mint in Winnipeg last spring.

There were two sides to Penny. We all know she wasn’t worth her weight in copper. To put it economically, Penny was no longer making cents. A perfectly minted penny cost 1.6 cents to produce, with not much of a resale value (except for that one time).

Penny was abundantly frugal, and many could take her or leave her. She weighed everyone down, and she was always upping the ante just ever so slightly. Despite her annoying tendencies, everyone always said she was, to coin a phrase, pretty as a, well, you know. But now that Penny got rolled, we are doomed to be nickelled and dimed to death.

Being Penniless leaves the maple leaf as the main subject of no Canadian coin. (That’s one less thing for Canadians to put maple on.) The good news is that the value of your thoughts has just gone up by 500 per cent.

Penny’s epitaph: Never more will she be pinched.

Evan Andrew Mackay is a Toronto playwright and humorist who writes about culture and social justice.

Edit Module

Join the conversation and have your say by commenting below. Our comment system uses a Facebook plugin. Please note that you'll have to turn off some ad-blockers in order to see the comments.

Edit Module

Follow us on Twitter @PostCity for more on what to eat, where to shop and what to do in Toronto.

Edit ModuleShow Tags

You may also like...

Parent Hacks: Getting through the long cottage drives without the in-car meltdowns

Parent Hacks: Getting through the long cottage drives without the in-car meltdowns

It can be particularly hard to keep the kids calm and occupied if this is a drive you consistently make on Friday afternoons, every weekend in the summer.
Posted 4 hours ago
The Pitch: Why you should go see Instructions

The Pitch: Why you should go see Instructions

Actress Diana Bentley on the new Coal Mine production
Posted 4 hours ago
The Big Night: A decade later, Tokyo Police Club sound off on their first gig, shaggy roots and playing CBC Music Festival this weekend

The Big Night: A decade later, Tokyo Police Club sound off on their first gig, shaggy roots and playing CBC Music Festival this weekend

Tokyo Police Club hits the stage on May 28 as part of a fantastic lineup of Canadian artists taking part in the CBC Music Festival at Echo Beach along with the likes of Hey Rosetta, the New Pornographers, Alvvays and many more.
Posted 9 hours ago
With condos claiming nearly every street corner, we look at what’s left of midtown’s historic charms

With condos claiming nearly every street corner, we look at what’s left of midtown’s historic charms

As condo development continues to spread throughout midtown Toronto we thought it was about time to do a photo feature on some of the area's remaining aesthetic gems.
Posted 9 hours ago